Jokes from LYN

Wife is like TV, girlfriend is like Handphone (HP)

At home watch TV, go out bring HP.

No money, sell TV. Got money change HP.

Sometimes enjoy TV, but most of the time play with HP.

TV free for life but HP, if you don't pay the services will be terminated.

TV is big, bulky and most of the time old, but handphone is cute, slim, curvy and very portable at any time.

Operational cost for TV is often acceptable but for HP is high and often demanding.

Most Important, TV got remote.. HP don't have..

Last but not least..
TV do not have virus, but h/p yes.. have VIRUS.. once get it, HABIS LA..

Sorry...

I notice one farni thing today...

My sister likes to call her husband not by his name, not by an animals name "deer"...

It goes like this:-!!!

 

Sorry, Can u get that to me?

Sorry, Can u pass the tissue？

Sorry, Can u take the bag?

Sorry, Can u move over?

Sorry, Can u ask for the bill?

Sorry, Can i order this?

Sorry, Can u shut up!!??? - Dis is i imagine myself wan...

Happy increases productivity!!!

One thing i notice the people in the office is efficient when they happy.

When trouble strikes them, they solved it, without any complaint, nowadays management people likes creative people, people that comes out with solution than complaining...

Let say you have stupid people working with you, when they face problem and they do not know what to do, they 1st thing that strikes their mind will be - DO NOT DO ANYTHING.

Hence, other people will sees this lad as lazy...thus lead to low productivity...

Well, in malaysia, lazy people tends to get a lot of help...due to the nature of the community...

So for the lazy people to be productive, you must provide them with EVERYTHING, from A-Z...

For Teh Tarik to Toilet paper, from Proper guidelines to telephone books thick contact list...

This will give them an easy life...Their brain will starts to root, by avoiding that they must start gossiping around, doing  alot of PR-ing during work, or log on to facebook or play online games...ZZZZzzzzz

Therefore happy people increase productivity.Give them less work!!!Provide them everything, they will have more time for customer, be more polite to customer, customer will come back to you...

And they do not need holiday, becuz to them, working is like holiday!!!

Only stressful people needs holidayz!

Of tolls and ministers...

Few weeks ago, our beloved PM gave orders to put on hold for toll hikes, but from the way i sees it, its die die situation for the rakyat.

Primary reason i say that is due to common sense, what initial agree with the contractor and gov was to increase toll at a certain interval, when that is not accomplish, gov will have to compensate, how they plan to compensate during recession?are they so stupid to compensate ??

Another solution is to increase the period for the toll collection. Eg: initial plan was to collect toll RM1.50for 15 yrs, after the first 6 yrs, increase toll for 60 cents to RM2.10. Suddenly recession, gov say put on hold, but kennot pay you now, why not we have an admendment say something like you collect for extra 6 years make it 21 yrs, and you dun sue me for me not letting u increase toll okie? DEAL!!! RAKYAT SUFFERSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSsssssssssssss

wtf man, why can't why can't why can't gov built the farking highway sendiri in the first place??
Scare something similar happen to MRR2 ?? or they got no money?? or try to suck the money from point A to point B??? As far as i know, singapore gov build, maintain and manage their highway, and its profitable, but over here, its profitable too but not to gov or they do actually make profit but not into the gov ledger that we do not know...

A cup of Tea

To manage a department is like making a nice cup of tea.

I always wanted to enjoy my cup of 'Cham' every morning. But the nature of my job denies it.

In order to make a nice cup of tea, you must 1st know the taste of each ingredient. Just like how you understands everyone in your department, how they do their work, how much can they willing to scacrifice their time.

What they want in return by the end of the day.

Secondly, you must know how much the amount of milk, tea and coffee to add in. Just like how u distribute work,but bear in mind that, adding too much like will make the tea taste awful. If you like coffee, add a decent amount, and not overdo it, else the taste of the coffee will 'covered' up all the others ingredient's taste.

Anyone can make a cup of tea, but to make a cup of tea that suits everyone is not what anyone can do.

Once Upon A Time...

In a Far Far Away land call Bolehland, where people are protected againts news from outside world and social views...

There was 3 brothers, people will call them buddy from hell ("Bloody Hell")

The Big Brother got an inspiration to open a bakery shop on an island. He sells all sorts of bread.

Then being a citizen in Bolehland, medium brother also follow(copy-cat), but he wants to be special, so he market his bread brilliantly. His bread is made without egg (Tiada Telur...)

The youngest brother thought it will be great to be part of the legacy, he too wants to be special, 

he decided to sell only Doughnut (Depan boleh, belakang pun boleh...) 

Embrace yourself for IMPACT!!!

Finally someone from the Cabinet admits that we are in deep shit! 

and ask us to embrace it until the end of 2010... Now this makes me wonder...

RECESSION RECESSION RECESSION!!!

Recession is like Period, juz that it happens 10-15 yrs every interval, and each time it hit us, IT HIT HARD ON US~!  And it last an awful 2 -5 yrs depending on the action taken. Eg : Stimulus Package.

When it happened on '97 i was still sucking milk, but times are bad back then, now its even worse, 

cuz when everyone is worried sick about their future, our minister can still laugh.

And approve toll hikes prior one month ahead then decided to put it on hold UNDEFINITELY when the day comes, just to create suspense!!! 

I meant its either fark-lah is sleeping in meetings or he is trying hard to show that he is ignorant, and i don't find that he is CARING  Okey!!! Deciding things last minute shows that he is indecisive!

And so i am really sick of malaysia daily news, it is as entertaining as entertainment news, and i give no fuck to entertainment news, in fact i've stop reading both of them.When the whole world is trying hard to recover from the economy crisis, we are here bashing each other,  tips and tricks here and there. Just for the sake of publicity. 

How can u concentrate on the current situation when you are worrying on something else???

You are not a LADY, you cannot Multitask!!! And even though you can, you cannot excel in it!!!!

And if this attitude is going to go on, in the next election, "WHOEVER WIN, WE the rakyat LOSE"